Labor tips for dads
by Buscando la luz on Sunday, July 18th, 2010 | No Comments
I also like to call this one: “Parturient Relations: PR for dads.” Remember these “Five PR’s”–the most helpful things you can provide for your partner while she labors…
1. Presence
- Sometimes all she needs is your loving physical presence.
- Be “Rock Steady”—the familiar, strong, soothing rock she can hold on to.
- Be “present” in every way—don’t let your fatigue or fear take your attention away from her emotional and physical needs.
- Do NOT fall asleep (unless she’s asleep).
- Do NOT leave her alone unless she demands it.
- Some women prefer to be alone while they labor. (But don’t go too far!)
2. Protection
- Be a buffer between your wife and the rest of the world.
- You can’t protect her from the intensity of childbirth or from unexpected complications, but you can protect her personal space and surround her with peace and calm.
- Close doors.
- Turn off/down the lights.
- Take over answering questions so she can keep her energy focused on her hard work. If someone tries to talk to her mid-contraction, gently ask for them to wait or stand between them and your wife until her contraction is over signaling with your hands for them to wait a moment.
- No matter what happens or how much stress may arise, ensure that she always feels safe and secure. Remember Jesus Christ’s calm in the storm that frightened his disciples: “Peace, be still.”
3. Pressure
- One of the most helpful hands-on ways to help with the most difficult contractions is counter-pressure.
- Use your hands to provide firm, strong, steady pressure.
- Lower back/pelvis
- Double hip squeeze
- Knees while sitting with something against her back
- Hip while side-lying
- Do not let up until the contraction ends! (You will probably get tired.)
- Use your hands to provide firm, strong, steady pressure.
4. Prompts
- Your wife will likely not be in a position to remember all of the ways to increase her comfort, so your job is to prompt her.
- Remember PURRR
- P Position: Is she changing position every half hour?
- U Urination: Is she using the bathroom every hour? (And drinking lots of fluids?)
- R Relaxation: Is she as relaxed as possible?
- R Respiration: Is she breathing evenly and as calmly as possible?
- R Rest: Is she resting between contractions?
5. Praise
- All of your words must instill her with hope, confidence, peace, comfort, pride, and power.
- Think of it as your job to help her get to the “finish line” without giving up.
- “You are so amazing right now!”
- “I am so proud of you!”
- “You are doing so well!”
- Kissing counts! (Some women find kissing very helpful.)
- When she says, “I can’t do it!” reply with, “You are doing it.”
- When she’s reached the point when she thinks she can’t do it anymore, that usually means she’s almost finished, so shower her with praise, encouragement, and lots of statements like: “You are so close!” “You’re almost there!” “The baby is almost here!”
