*doula blog

Birth Faith gives some GREAT resources on pregnancy/labor/birthing. This one is (I think) my favorite.....

Labor tips for dads

by Buscando la luz on Sunday, July 18th, 2010 | No Comments

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I also like to call this one: “Parturient Relations: PR for dads.” Remember these “Five PR’s”–the most helpful things you can provide for your partner while she labors…

1. Presence

• Sometimes all she needs is your loving physical presence.
  • Be “Rock Steady”—the familiar, strong, soothing rock she can hold on to.
• Be “present” in every way—don’t let your fatigue or fear take your attention away from her emotional and physical needs.
• Do NOT fall asleep (unless she’s asleep).
• Do NOT leave her alone unless she demands it.
  • Some women prefer to be alone while they labor. (But don’t go too far!)

2. Protection

• Be a buffer between your wife and the rest of the world.
• You can’t protect her from the intensity of childbirth or from unexpected complications, but you can protect her personal space and surround her with peace and calm.
  • Close doors.
  • Turn off/down the lights.
  • Take over answering questions so she can keep her energy focused on her hard work. If someone tries to talk to her mid-contraction, gently ask for them to wait or stand between them and your wife until her contraction is over signaling with your hands for them to wait a moment.
  • No matter what happens or how much stress may arise, ensure that she always feels safe and secure. Remember Jesus Christ’s calm in the storm that frightened his disciples: “Peace, be still.”

3. Pressure

• One of the most helpful hands-on ways to help with the most difficult contractions is counter-pressure.
  • Use your hands to provide firm, strong, steady pressure.
    • Lower back/pelvis
    • Double hip squeeze
    • Knees while sitting with something against her back
    • Hip while side-lying
  • Do not let up until the contraction ends! (You will probably get tired.)

4. Prompts

• Your wife will likely not be in a position to remember all of the ways to increase her comfort, so your job is to prompt her.
• Remember PURRR
  • P Position: Is she changing position every half hour?
  • U Urination: Is she using the bathroom every hour? (And drinking lots of fluids?)
  • R Relaxation: Is she as relaxed as possible?
  • R Respiration: Is she breathing evenly and as calmly as possible?
  • R Rest: Is she resting between contractions?

5. Praise

• All of your words must instill her with hope, confidence, peace, comfort, pride, and power.
• Think of it as your job to help her get to the “finish line” without giving up.
  • “You are so amazing right now!”
  • “I am so proud of you!”
  • “You are doing so well!”
  • Kissing counts! (Some women find kissing very helpful.)
  • When she says, “I can’t do it!” reply with, “You are doing it.”
  • When she’s reached the point when she thinks she can’t do it anymore, that usually means she’s almost finished, so shower her with praise, encouragement, and lots of statements like: “You are so close!” “You’re almost there!” “The baby is almost here!”